Saturday, June 12, 2010

Gonna Be Alright...

Songs seem to be inspirations for my last couple of blogs. I introduced my niece Haley to these words in the song "Salvation is Here." I even got her to do an arm punch as we sang, "It's gonna be alright." My North Point pals would understand that significance. I think we must have listened to the song on repeat for over an hour.

I need those words especially today. I've read in several grief books that I will experience waves of emotions. Today, it was wave after wave, each one different. A wave of sadness, a wave of joyful reflection, a wave of anger (cell phone companies, urr!), and back to sadness again. I tell myself, it's gonna be alright, and I picture my sweet niece giggling and smiling.

Oh to be six years old and so excited about the simplicities of life...dressing up fancy and eating steak for dinner, making her aunt dress up in a red sparkle dress, complete with a hot pink bow and red polish on fingers and nails (yes, fingers too!), and going to see the Cabbage Patch land and coming home with a stuffed animal cat instead. On the way home after our little excursion, Haley told me she was gonna lose her voice from telling her mom all about our time together.

She sees the best in life and in her own way she reminds me that it is gonna be alright. Most days it is hard to believe that. Right now, it's even hard to type those words, tears streaming down my face.

God, on days I struggle to see it, please remind me that it's gonna be alright.

Dearly loved,

1 comment:

  1. That beautiful girl in your arms there and her precious brother Caden are sometimes the only reason I can get out of bed in the mornings. I get my God HELLO's in another fashion than you do sis. Caden will wake me and tell me that's is going to be a BUUUTIFULLLLL DAY Mommy with a little song in his delivery and then just hug me. Those special moments remind me that I am here now and I need to focus on that. For who is to say that I'll have that tomorrow to feel my children's love again.